When people think of meditation, they usually don’t connect it to more pleasure in the bedroom. It makes sense—one involves sitting still and being quiet, and the other involves some form of physical activity. And yet the two are more connected than you might think. Still, this begs the question: Can you really meditate your way to more pleasure in the bedroom?
In short: Yes. You most certainly can and should use meditation as a way to achieve more pleasurable intimacy. This is true regardless of your relationship status; increasing intimacy with yourself or your partner is never a bad thing. So, on top of all the health benefits meditation boasts, this is just another one to add to that list. That said, you don’t have to be a meditation expert in order to tap into your sexual inner zen, either. In fact, it’s way more simple than you think.
Experiencing pleasure is your birthright; you shouldn’t have to sacrifice or suffer through mediocrity in the bedroom. Keep reading to learn how to meditate your way to more pleasure in the bedroom, and the 4 meditations for a better sex life..
How To Meditate Your Way to More Pleasure in the Bedroom:
The Correlations Between Intimacy and Meditation:
Meditation decreases stress, helps boost your overall mood and energy, and can help relieve pain in the body. It’s no secret that stress can seriously impact your libido and lower your sex drive, and you’re not going to be in the mood to get it on when you’re exhausted, irritable, or in pain. In addition, according to Psych Central, meditation can also help numerous sexual health conditions in both men and women.
Additionally, the entire goal of meditation is to be fully present in the moment. Of course, this is oftentimes easier said than done. So, if your mind does wander, meditation shows you how to gently bring yourself back to the present.
Meditation also teaches you to examine your innermost thoughts and feelings without judgment. Doing this on a regular basis not only helps you stay grounded, but it also increases your self-love which, in turn boosts confidence. When you’re feeling confident and at peace with yourself your mind is less likely to wander; you’re more attuned to your needs as well as your partner’s. “The intimacy we share, build, and maintain relies on how mindful we are when we physically connect,” an article published on Headspace states.
Meditations for More Pleasure in the Bedroom:
Being more mindful will make you more aware of sensations and help you stay attuned to your body and your partner’s (if you’re not doing it solo). Plus, reaching climax will be much easier. In order to tap into your sexual inner zen, there are quite a few meditations you can turn to.
Daily Mindfulness Practices
Implementing daily mindfulness practices into your life will help you center yourself and decrease stress. This, in turn, will make you more present in the bedroom. If you’re a beginner, try starting with deep breathing exercises and journaling after your experience. The Book of Awakening by Mark Nepo is also another great mindfulness tool. Once you feel comfortable with that, you can dive into mindfulness meditation.
Sit cross-legged on the ground or on the edge of a seat with your feet touching the ground and crossed at the ankles. Set a timer for 10-15 minutes (you can work your way up as you go), and close your eyes. To get into a meditative state, you can silently repeat a mantra to yourself, count the length of your breath as you inhale and exhale, or focus on the space in between each breath.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, there are numerous meditation apps and videos online that provide additional guidance. You can also turn to Flawless World’s Morning Ritual Guide, which is free when you sign up for the weekly newsletter. Flawless World’s Morning Ritual Guide has step-by-step instructions for meditation, and an area to journal post-meditation notes.
Self-Love/Compassion Meditation
We can be our own worst critics, and when we’re too hard on ourselves, our self-love deteriorates. Opening yourself up to mental and physical intimacy is much more difficult when you’re not open, comfortable, and vulnerable with yourself. This can also affect body image and confidence, which in turn makes it harder to open up and achieve pleasure in the bedroom.
Set yourself up the same way you would for a mindfulness meditation. Place one hand on your heart and the other on your stomach, and silently repeat a mantra that promotes self-love and releases suffering. I personally love the mantra, “May all beings suffering be happy and free.” The RAIN of Self-Compassion by Tara Brach is also another great one for this. It’s a guided meditation that teaches us to look at ourselves with love and compassion, and de-condition the suffering of being at war with ourselves.
Body Scan
A body scan will make you more in tune with your body and heighten your arousal and desire. To start, lie down in a position that comfortably allows you to stretch your limbs. Close your eyes and breathe deeply, then begin scanning every part of your body from head to toe. Notice how each section feels, and whether or not there’s any pain or tension. Sit with any sensations and feelings for a moment or two, then gently release them and move on to the next body part. When you’re done, sit with your entire body for several seconds, then slowly open your eyes and bring your attention back to your surroundings.
You can also do this with a partner. Sit back-to-back and repeat the body scan mentioned above. Once you’ve finished, focus on the points of contact between you and your partner; note any sensations of pressure or tension, texture, and even temperature. Pay attention to anything that you’d pick up on during an intimate moment. This exercise will help you both be more attuned to each other’s needs.
Visualization
Chances are, you probably have some inkling as to what turns you on or what your fantasies might be. Taking the time to truly sit still and visualize them will help you better connect with yourself and your deepest turn-ons. Begin by getting in a comfortable position, either laying down or sitting up, then close your eyes and breathe deeply to fully relax your body.
Now, imagine yourself there in your fantasy or turn-on; really see it in your mind. Imagine what it would smell like, any flavors you might taste, and any sounds you might hear. Next, feel everything; look out for any particular body parts where you feel more pleasure. Take note of that desire, and allow it to flow freely throughout the rest of your body. The goal of this is to awaken all your senses and desires so you can better tune in to, experience, and manifest more pleasure in the bedroom. Continue for as long as you like, then slowly open your eyes and bring yourself back to reality.
