When it comes to hair color levels, they’re based on a scale of 1-12–12 being the ultra lightest blonde (aka platinum blonde), and 1 being black. My natural hair color is a level 3, which is dark brown. I’d always wanted to be a level 12 (lightest/platinum blonde), and with the help of my amazing hair dresser, we managed to both take care of my hair and get it to platinum without destroying it in the process. (Trust me, it was a slow and loooong process, but totally worth it. My hair and scalp were very grateful.) Because my roots are so dark, over the past three years I’d been going to get my hair done every two months versus my previous three. This schedule was something that I stuck to. And so this year, there came a point where I was due to go and get my hair done, and then… COVID happened.
I wasn’t really upset because there was nothing I could do. It’s not like I was the only one in the world unable to get their hair done, it was what it was. So, I embraced my roots, and wondered how long it’d be before I looked like a full-blown brunette again (mostly with my hair pulled back). I was positive I wouldn’t like it, but I really had no choice—I certainly wasn’t about to go and try to do my hair myself, I don’t have a death wish on my hair. And then the funniest thing happened: I loved it. I loved the contrast, and was surprised to see how much my roots brought out my dark features. I’d previously loved how the blonde hair contrasted with the dark features on my face, which is what led me to believe that having darker hair would only wash me out. Turns out I was wrong. This got me thinking about different hair colors—something I hadn’t done in a long, long time. I started mostly looking at different honey blonde hair colors, and bronde (brown and blonde) hair colors. I loved the bronde hair color, but I also really loved the platinum contrast with my dark roots.
So when everything slowly started opening back up again, four months had passed, and my roots—though I loved them—were way overdue for a touch-up. Something needed to be done. And so in the beginning of June, I finally reunited with my hairdresser again. I decided to stick to what I knew—I wasn’t ready to take the plunge and switch it up again, not after taking so long to get and keep my hair healthy. I’d wanted to try and keep a little bit of the contrast at my roots and fill in most of the growth, but my hairdresser wasn’t able to because she didn’t want it to come out uneven, it’d be hard to get everything precisely so. And so once again I was a platinum blonde, roots be gone.
I’m not going to lie, at first I missed my roots, but as the summer months went on, I once again fell in love with how the platinum blonde contrasted against my dark features and summer tan. I decided that I’d get my hair done at the beginning of August—keeping in time with my 2 month schedule—and then come fall, I’d push it back to every 3. But, you know what they say about plans—when people make plans, God laughs.
On August 1 I lost my grandmother—my role model, and one of the biggest, most important people in my life—and suddenly getting my hair done wasn’t on the forefront of my mind. I spent a lot of time in the immediate aftermath with my family, and then eventually friends. I was focused on enjoying life, enjoying summer, because I knew that it was going to come to an end quickly. I wanted to get outside while I still could, enjoy the beach, swim in the ocean—I didn’t want to have to worry about not being able to swim because I’d just gotten my hair done. So, I let it go. Come September, the same thing sort of happened. I got caught up in family things, in enjoying the remaining days of warm weather and my favorite season. And then it was the beginning October and I really didn’t want to get my hair platinum again. I knew I didn’t want to, I felt it, which is why I waited until I knew exactly what I wanted to do.
All this time, I kept looking at that bronde hair color, specifically the one Khloé Kardashian was rocking a little earlier this year. I kept going back to it. I’d always been terrified of dark hair because I felt like it washed me out, but suddenly, I wasn’t so scared anymore. I found myself thinking that with the right hair color, I could pull it off. As I looked in the mirror every day and stared at the five-month growth of my roots, I knew it was time to make a decision. Time to make a change.
LEFT: BEFORE; RIGHT: AFTER
For 10 years now—since I was 15 years old—I’ve been on a journey to becoming platinum blonde. It took me until 17 to find my amazing hairdresser, and it took until I was 20 to finally get my hair platinum. (It took so long because she was insistent on not killing it, and I was in agreeance with her.) For the past 5 years I’ve been a platinum blonde, and for the last decade I’ve had some variation of blonde hair.
The past 3 years have held a lot of personal growth for me—this year especially, as it’s been the most challenging with my neck injury, the passing of my grandma, and more. And I felt like with all the change happening inside of myself and my life as well, it was time for a change. I feel like it’s the end of an era for me, as crazy as that sounds. The platinum blonde hair symbolizes some of the biggest moments I’ve had so far in my life, and this new hair color signifies a massive turning point in it. It coincides with all of the changes happening within and around me. Someone told me that when a person sports their natural hair color, it can bring out an authenticity in themselves. (Think personal growth, increased self-awareness, elevated mindfulness, etc.) I’ve been falling more in love with my hair every day, and I’m ready to find out what this darker hair has in store for me.