Most of you probably know by now that before my car accident in 2017 I was pursuing my dream of becoming a professional wrestler. Things in wrestling were really starting to pick up–I had my first match at a sold-out baseball stadium in Ohio; I was traveling every weekend for different shows in different states–and then, suddenly, nothing. Poof. All gone. In the blink of an eye.
I’ve gone into detail about the injuries I sustained during that accident and the aftermath that followed–my subsequent shoulder surgery and never-ending neck injury I’m still dealing with today–but I’ve never talked about the aimless drifting I did in my life as far as my passions and creativity were concerned during the aftermath.
The time after my accident was a very dark time in my life. My relationship was in a very low, bad place.; my wrestling dream was put on hold. I could no longer work, so the times I would’ve been able to busy myself and distract my mind from all of this was gone, and my friends had their own lives and jobs to attend to and were there for me when they were able to be (which I’m of course grateful for). But the biggest thing of al was: I was alone. Every aspect of my life that had made me happy, fueled my passions and dreams, gave me something to look forward to when I woke up in the morning was gone. The person I confided in and trusted most was barely there. My entire life was in shambles, my future uncertain. I was left with the discarded wreckage of a life that I had no control over; the destruction someone else’s fault entirely.
I started by escaping into books. It was still summertime after my car accident, and at the time I was still living at home, so I took advantage of the hot weather and laid out every single day with a good book in my hand. It was the thing, at the beginning, that kept me sane. I got lost in fictional mysteries and other people’s problems; it gave me reprieve from the mess of my life for just a short amount of time. I joined the Goodreads app and set up a reading challenge for myself, which gave me a goal to try and meet and something I could focus on. I also got super tan, which was obviously an added plus. Despite everything, I managed to get lucky that year with the weather. September and October were unseasonably hot that year in Rhode Island, which gave me more time to read outside and slowly come to grips with what was happening. Every other aspect of my life was still messy at that time–my relationship was slowly being repaired, I started getting debilitating migraines every single day, the initial adrenaline rush from the accident was wearing off and my injuries and pain were setting in hard–but I found that during the times I was hurting mentally, picking up a good book would help ground me again. Books have this magical power of always calming me down.
But then November came, and the weather turned, and it was too cold to go outside. I now had to find something else to keep me busy during the day. For as long as I can remember, I’ve always loved writing. So, I decided I was going to write a psychological thriller. I dove into it headfirst, but did have to take some time away from writing after my shoulder surgery in 2018 while I was recovering. As time went on, I continued writing more regularly again whenever I could. I finished my novel in the beginning of January 2019 and started looking at ways to get the story published, while also beginning to work on my second novel and let my creative ideas flow.
One of the biggest reasons I fell in love with professional wrestling in the first place was because of the creative aspect of it. It requires you to think outside the box, apply different personas and put on a show. I’ve been very creative ever since I was a little girl, and anything I’ve ever pursued has always been in some sort of a creative field. I remember being five years old and watching Lizzie McGuire and thinking: I can do that one day. I can be an actress. I took drama camps and participated in plays at school. I started dancing at the age of 3, and I also wanted to be a professional dancer and own my own dance studio. Next, I wanted to be a screenwriter; after that followed fashion designer and singer. As I got older and started thinking about college and careers, I still wanted to do something in the spotlight, but a lot of the adults in my life swayed me to picking a “safe” career (you can only imagine how they reacted when I decided to pursue professional wrestling, lol). Children–including teenagers–are so malleable; they take heed to the adults they trust in their life, so I decided to go to school for journalism. That was, until I found professional wrestling. Then all bets were off.
I was happy while I was writing my books; it was a great way to exercise my love of writing and get my creative energy out, but it still felt like something was missing. There was a void in me that wasn’t being filled. I was scrolling through an article one night on my phone when suddenly it hit me: I needed to start a blog. I was going to start a blog. I immediately dove into researching everything I could about blogging–the best platforms and hosting websites to use, the best templates and responsive layouts, how to set up a newsletter, writing and publishing and categories–I researched everything I could think of that would be useful in creating my blog. When it came time to name my blog, I grabbed a blank piece of single-lined paper and filled both the front and back with ideas. I knew I wanted to do something with the word “diamond” or “flawless” in it, as my wrestling name was “Arianna Diamond” and my tagline was “flawless;” people who had been following along my wrestling journey through social media were somewhat familiar with these two words, and it just felt right. It felt like me. As I stared at that sheet of paper, covered everywhere in my bubbly handwriting, I settled on Flawless World immediately. I circled it; I knew I’d found my name. I began building Flawless World, working tirelessly day in and day out, until it was all ready for the launch: September 1, 2019, which also happened to be my 24th birthday.
Before I started my diet for a bikini competition I wanted to enter in 2015, my boyfriend asked his subscribers on his YouTube channel whether they’d be more interested in following along my fitness journey on a blog or through YouTube. I was leaning more towards blogging, but wanted to hear the opinions from what was probably going to be some of my potential audience. Unsurprisingly, YouTube was the more popular response, so I went for it and made a YouTube channel. When I ended up not being able to compete in said bikini competition, my video uploads became sporadic, then eventually nonexistent. During all of this my dream was still to become a professional wrestler, and once I worked up the courage to go for it and dive in, I also began documenting my wrestling journey on my YouTube channel once again starting in 2016. After my accident in 2017, I continued uploading for a bit, but eventually stopped. It didn’t feel right or completely authentic to continue uploading while my future was uncertain, and at the time, rehabilitating myself and injuries was top priority because I wanted to get back to wrestling again.
I say all of this to say that it seems as though blogging was calling me all along. In my pre-teen and teen years, I loved reading magazines more than anything. I loved being able to pick up something that was so diverse and had interviews from celebrities and the like. I loved being able to learn new things about fashion and relationships. I’d always read the author bios at the end of each article; I’d study the way they framed and worded everything. It wasn’t until I was reading that final article on my phone the night I decided I was going to start a blog that I realized I loved learning and doing everything from reading. Some people gravitate towards videos when they need to learn something or are interested in buzzworthy news, while others gravitate towards reading the steps and juicy details. I have always gravitated towards the latter.
The night I decided to start a blog I think I realized, subconsciously, that it had been calling to me all along. I missed the diversity and creative freedom wrestling had allowed me that writing a book did not. Of course telling a story takes a lot of creativity and imagination, but you can’t mesh different subjects together in a novel the way you can in a blog or magazine. I wanted a broader umbrella to work under and let my creativity flow. I needed it. Blogging feels more authentic to me than being an author ever did.
You may be wondering whether or not I would’ve started this blog if my wrestling dreams hadn’t been derailed. My answer is this: I don’t know. I know no one can wrestle forever, so maybe I would’ve created Flawless World eventually. What I do know, now. is that blogging is my absolute calling and passion. Wrestling was too, but what happened was out of my control. I fought tooth and nail to get back in the ring, but I’m smart enough to listen to a neurosurgeon when they tell me no.
Flawless World is my baby, my dream, my hobbies, and my passions all bundled into one. It may have taken awhile for me to recognize that blogging was calling to me, but I got there in the end. I’ve learned a lot since we went live, and I’m still learning, but I have absolutely loved every step along the way. Flawless World does not play second fiddle to my wrestling dream, it is my dream. I did not replace my dream of becoming a professional wrestler with this blog; I simply went through the phases in my life I needed to in order to get to this point. I now have full control over exercising my creativity, and I can do so in a variety of ways. Despite all the bumps, mishaps, injuries, and loss, I managed to find my calling, the thing that gets me excited when I wake up every morning, that fulfills me absolutely.
Love it!
Author
I’m so happy you enjoyed! Thanks for reading 🙂