I don’t have many regrets in life, but the one thing I’d change if I could go back in time is expand my sexual wellness knowledge. After all, roughly 98% of what I know now didn’t come from junior high health class. In truth, it took years of subpar sex before I finally figured it out well into my 20’s.
The truth is, most of us start having sex before we really know what we’re doing. And because sex and shame often go hand in hand, we’re usually too scared to ask for help or have open and honest convos with our friends, doctors, and family members about sexual health.
It’s 2024, and it’s time to change the narrative. Which is why Flawless World’s teamed up with Coconu to celebrate sexual wellness month. Keep scrolling to learn 7 ways to upgrade your sexual wellness routine right now.
How To Upgrade Your Sexual Wellness Routine:
1. Lubricate daily
It’s no secret that everyone should be using lube during any kind of play, but it’s time for the vulva-owners of the world to take it a step further. Because let’s be real: Vaginal dryness sucks. While experiencing vaginal dryness is completely normal (it’s more common than you think), that doesn’t make it hurt any less.
The good news is that the days of suffering from vaginal dryness are no more, because once again, lube has saved the day. Incorporate lubrication into your daily routine by applying lube down there after the shower and as needed throughout the day. Just be sure to look for safe, gentle, and all-natural formulas to avoid irritation. Likewise, if you’re traveling or heading out for the day, carry some travel packets with you to ensure everything stays moisturized.
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2. Move regularly
Haven’t you heard? Exercise is a natural aphrodisiac. It releases endorphins that help boost mood, gets your blood pumping, and naturally boosts libido. So, make a point to get moving regularly. This doesn’t have to be anything crazy either—it can simply be a dance party in your living room or a nature walk outside. You’ll feel good no matter how you move.
3. Pencil in self-pleasure on your calendar
We’re all busy AF, and I don’t know about you, but sex is the last thing on my mind when I crawl into bed after a long day. However, sexual wellness starts with you. Which is why it’s vital to pencil in self-pleasure on your calendar. As a sex writer, this is something I swear by. Not only does it help keep my libido in check, but it also helps me discover new things about myself (spoiler: there’s so much to learn).
The more comfortable you are with being sexual, the better your sex life will be. Schedule time at least once or twice a week to engage in solo play, regardless of your relationship status. This will help build up anticipation and excitement, and also make sex a priority. Likewise, don’t be afraid to set the mood with low lighting and candles, and find new toys and erotica to play with and listen to.
Additionally, if you are in a relationship, consider scheduling sex with your partner. This may sound like the most unsexy thing in the world, but experts swear by it. It’ll make intimacy with your partner a priority and help strengthen your connection.
4. Do more of what makes you feel good
While this undoubtedly applies to engaging in more sexual activity regularly, it also applies to every other area of your life. Sexual wellness starts from the inside out, and the more you take care of yourself, the sexier you’ll feel. So, do more of what makes you feel good by engaging in intentional acts of self-care. This could include anything from indulging in at-home spa treatments to cooking yourself a nice meal, getting 8 hours of sleep and everything in between.
5. Speak up for yourself in the bedroom
I came of age during a time period that told women sex wasn’t supposed to be enjoyable for them and that it was only pleasurable for men (yes; let that sink in for a minute). Needless to say, this confused and hindered my ability to fully understand how to communicate in the bedroom, and it took years of boring sex for me to finally realize that if I was going to have sex, I needed to be my own advocate.
Sex is supposed to be fun for all parties involved. But it starts with strong communication. So, dear reader, it’s time to learn how to ask for what you want in the bedroom (seriously—read that article). Start by learning what you like during solo play and communicate your needs to your partner ahead of time. Also, be sure to use words and body language as a guide during sex to direct your partner where you want. Remember: You deserve an orgasm as much as anyone.
6. Stress less
In case you didn’t know already, stress and tension can seriously inhibit libido and impact your ability to orgasm, which is why de-stressing as much as possible is key. Make sure you’re setting aside time for yourself everyday, even if it’s just 15 minutes in the morning or evening to journal and meditate. Giving yourself time to unwind is going to help you loosen up naturally and promote a better overall well-being.
Additionally, enlisting the help of some CBD-infused products can also help. Case in point? I’ve found that applying Coconu’s Hemp Infused Body Oil to the areas I’m feeling sore daily helps ease discomfort, release tension, and enhance relaxation so I stay primed and ready for action. Plus, this body oil also doubles as lube, and can be used for(e) play however you like.
COCONU
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7. Talk about sex positively
Despite how far we’ve come, there’s still some serious societal stigmas around sex. But it’s time to change that narrative, and one of the best ways to start is by talking about sex positively. Make a point to engage in healthy conversations about sex with the people in your life, like your friends, significant other, sexual partners, family members, etc. Getting used to discussing sex in a positive light will empower you to fully embrace your sexuality, and you’ll experience more sexual pleasure as a result.
