It’s no secret that sex gets better with age. Granted, it takes years of trying different things and slogging through those godawful one-night stands and unpleasant fumblings to finally experience true euphoria, but it’s worth it in the end. However, even still, no matter how satisfied you are sexually, there is always room for improvement. This is where making sex resolutions comes in.
Admittedly, setting sex resolutions may sound extremely unsexy and weird, but I promise you: It’s not. The truth is, committing to prioritizing pleasure and making sex a priority is the perfect way to practice self-care. After all, taking care of sexual wellness is crucial to taking care of your overall well-being.
Allow me to introduce to you 7 sex resolutions for a mind-blowing sex life. These resolutions will bring you more pleasure, regardless of your relationship status and where you are on your sexual journey.
Important sex tips to remember:
Before you start upgrading your sex life, here are some important things to remember:
- There is no ‘normal.’ You like what you like! Everyone’s tastes and preferences vary, so don’t get caught up in what you think you “should” or “shouldn’t” be doing and enjoying.
- Sex isn’t shameful. We come from sex, and sex isn’t shameful; it’s natural. If you have any sexual shame, try your best to let it go and embrace who you are as a sexual being.
- Go at your own pace. Sex isn’t a race, and you should only do what you feel comfortable with.
- Resolutions can be made at any time. It doesn’t matter what month it is. Whether it’s January, June, or December, committing to improving your sex life is always a good idea.
- Sex doesn’t have to be with a partner. The most important relationship we have is with ourselves, so if you’re single, don’t let your sexual wellness fall by the wayside. You can still have an incredible sex life all on your own.
So without further ado, let’s get into it. From different types of orgasms to wellness practices, sex toys, kinks and everything in-between, this is everything you need to have a mind-blowing sex life. Keep scrolling to learn the 7 sex resolutions to make this year.
Sex resolutions to make this year:
1. Have different orgasms
Let’s officially declare this the year of the big “O” and make it a goal to have different kinds of orgasms. If you didn’t know already, both men and women can have multiple different kinds, and the more you experience, the better your sex life will be.
Using sex toys alone or with a partner (or both!) is one of the easiest ways to discover more about your body and the different ways you can stimulate yourself and climax. G-spot vibrators and long, glass dildos can help women achieve internal orgasms, and prostate vibrators can help men have P-spot ones (which is essentially the male equivalent to G-spot orgasms). Likewise, couples vibrators or multi-functional sex toys will let both partners experience extra stimulation during sex.
Additionally, taking your time to orgasm through foreplay or edging—alone or with a partner—can also help. Once you’ve experienced and played around with different types of orgasms, you can then work on having a blended orgasm, regardless of your anatomy. This is when multiple areas of your body are being stimulated simultaneously and lead to climax (an extremely euphoric experience, thank you very much).
2. Really learn what you like
Knowing what turns you on and what your body responds best to is key to having a satisfying sex life. So, take the time to learn more about yourself and explore your body on your own. Masturbating is the most obvious way to do this and works well, but you can also try listening or reading erotica, watching porn, or listening to sex ASMR. You can also learn what your erotic blueprint is or try taking a kink quiz.
3. Stop settling in the bedroom
It’s time to say goodbye to subpar sex for good and stop settling in the bedroom. Once you’ve taken the time to learn yourself, what you like, and what your body responds best to, you can then ask for it and get what you want, every single time.
If you’re in a relationship, pick the right time to talk to your partner about your sex life, expectations, and needs. Remember that people tend to respond best when you’re open, direct, honest, positive, and kind. Additionally, using body language or words during the act—single or taken—can also help guide your partner correctly. And lastly, stop faking orgasms once and for all; your partner won’t be able to improve if they think they’re doing everything correctly.
Related: How To Ask Your Partner for What You Want in the Bedroom
4. Experiment
Being open-minded is key to evolving your sex life, so don’t be afraid to experiment! This could be anything from trying new positions, exploring kinks and fetishes, incorporating toys, and so on. Sexual exploration usually leads to sexual self-discovery and more pleasure, which is a win all-around.
That said, it’s important that you start with what you feel most comfortable with. This, of course, will vary for everyone. For some, this may be something as simple as bringing lube or toys into the bedroom. For others, it might be having a threesome or playing around with BDSM. Likewise, experimenting with praise kink or bringing ASMR into the bedroom are also two major sex trends RN that you can explore.
5. Get in touch with your sensuality
Being in touch with your sensuality is more than just sex. Of course, having sex is part of it, but it’s more about being at one with yourself and embracing who you are as a sexual being. In addition to learning what you like and asking and getting what you want in the bedroom, do more of what makes you feel good. Exercising and eating right, taking a bath to de-stress, or spritzing on your favorite perfume are some examples of this.
6. Enhance your sex life with mindfulness
Mindfulness refers to the ability to be in the present moment; during sex, this makes you more aware of every sensation, which makes the experience so much more enjoyable. Practicing mindfulness outside of the bedroom is the easiest way to bring it into it. Doing daily mindfulness practices like meditating, journaling, deep breathing or yoga are great ways to do this. Likewise, doing a sex meditation can help you embrace your sensuality and become a mindful sex god, regardless of your gender or anatomy.
During sex, try to focus on your breath; this will help you stay rooted in the present moment and fully experience every sensation. In addition, you can also try having tantric sex and focusing on foreplay and taking things slow. Touch is also another way you can do this (think: full body massage).
7. Stop comparing your sex life to others
It’s easy to fall victim to the comparison trap with everything in life, and sex is no different. You may hear others boast about all the crazy orgasms they’re having, or stumble upon something that makes you question if you’re having good sex; or, worse, if you’re any good in bed. But these thoughts lead nowhere good, and allowing yourself to get caught up in them will only hinder your sex life.
Promise to yourself to stop comparing your sex life to others. At the end of the day, no one’s sex life is the same—and that’s a good thing! It’d be boring if we were all the same in bed. So, stay true to yourself and what you like, be open-minded, and embrace your sexuality. If you can do that, you’re golden.
