10 Ways To Overcome Loss of Attraction To Your Partner

When it comes to attraction between two people, it’s more than just looks. Often, it’s usually a combination of appearance, personality, characteristics, and so on. Of course, in the beginning of a relationship, physical attraction is typically the strongest; over time, though, that pull will naturally simmer down—but it won’t go away completely. Which is why it can especially scary if you’re in a relationship and suddenly feeling a loss of attraction to your partner.

Naturally, this can be pretty alarming and cause warning bells to go off in your head, wondering whether or not the relationship has met its demise. The good news, though, is that loss of attraction is pretty common in long-term relationships, which means that it can be dealt with and overcome.

The best thing you can do when you’re feeling a loss of attraction to someone you’re committed to is to try and find your way back to them again. Keep on reading to learn how to deal with and overcome a loss of attraction to your partner with these 10 steps to reconnect.

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10 Steps To Overcome Loss of Attraction:

1. Spend more time together

Chances are, the spark between the two of you is still there, and spending one-on-one time together will help you find it. Prioritize time with each other—do things like weekly date nights, eating dinner together regularly, going to bed together, and so on and so forth. Not only will spending more time together help you reconnect, it’ll remind both of you why you fell in love in the first place and strengthen your bond and relationship.

2. Have deep conversations

There’s nothing sexier than someone who can hold and carry an intelligent conversation. While small talk may inspire someone to open up, conversations that really make you think and dive deep will help you reconnect. After all, a lot of people are attracted to the mind, and this will be helpful for those who think intelligence is a huge turn-on.

3. Switch up routines

Routines are great, but they also create comfort zones. So, try being adventurous and switching up your routines! Spontaneity can be fun. And shaking things up will add some spice to the relationship once again.

4. Try new things together

Nothing’s more special than trying new things with your partner. So, get adventurous and explore. Whether you opt for a wine and paint night or take a spontaneous road trip, the choice is yours! Creating new memories together will help bring the spark back. Likewise, it’ll also give you something to talk about for years to come.

5. Make intimacy a regular thing

In the beginning of a relationship, most people can’t keep their hands off of each other. But intimacy tends to get put on the back burner as time goes by. (Which is completely normal, FYI). Plus, the longer you go without getting it on, the less you tend to want it.

To combat this, make intimacy a regular thing in your relationship. This may mean scheduling it, trying new things in the bedroom, or making sure you’re both satisfied. Whatever you decide, prioritizing intimacy will help restore that physical connection and attraction.

6. Take care of yourselves

Let’s be clear: Love isn’t contingent on vanity. However, putting your health and self-care on the back burner is going to send your partner the wrong message. It’s another sign of complacency and essentially tells your S.O that you’re taking them for granted.

This may sound vain, but it makes sense when you think about it. After all, there’s nothing sexier than someone who takes care of themselves. And I don’t just mean going to the gym and eating right, either—I mean someone who prioritizes self-care. Plus, a healthy libido is a sign of a healthy body and mind.

7. Voice your feelings

Communication is key in all relationships, which is why it’s important to voice your feelings. Just keep in mind that when it comes to having any sort of talk, picking the right time and place is key. Your partner will likely be less receptive after they’ve had a stressful day. Likewise, it’s also important to remember that it’s not what you say but how you say it.

That said, opening up to your partner about the loss of attraction you’re feeling may be a bit intimidating. If you find yourself getting worked up and anxious over broaching the topic, try to meditate, journal, or do some deep breathing to steady yourself and mind. And remember: Keeping your feelings buried will only make things worse in the long run.

8. Ask what you can do for them

All relationships are give and take—they aren’t sustainable when only one person is giving and the other’s taking. After talking to them about your feelings, be sure to ask what you can do for them. That’s what being in an equal relationship is all about.

9. Try doing things you did in the beginning of your relationship

The brain is a powerful thing. Not only does it store memories for us, but it also elicits the feelings we had during said memories. This is why doing things you did in the beginning of your relationship can help you reconnect and overcome that loss of attraction.

For example, if you initially went to drive-in movies all the time, try going to them again. Likewise, if there was a show you bonded over, try re-watching it together. Some people are more nostalgic than others, but doing these kinds of things will ignite your senses, remind you of happy memories, and elicit desire.

10. See a professional

If you’re really struggling to reconnect, consider enlisting the help of a professional. Whether you o pt for individual or couples therapy is totally up to you; be sure to do your due diligence and research to find which one is right for your situation. Therapy doesn’t have to be forever, and there’s absolutely no shame in it. Sometimes, professional intervention is what you need to get the relationship back on track again.